21 Days–daily writing–Day 8

The last days I noticed some shitty points within me. I didnt stand & work disciplined & consistently with my decision what I made like shaving my head/being bald as a statement of myself that I work for what is best for all in each & every single moment, stopping myself immediately of participating in thoughts - allowing backchats, falling again & again in some specific patterns where I wanted not see that a primary point was dominance.

 

Over one year now I work with & as Desteni – the material is in front of myself but I was a fucking lazy bastard to use all of it & work with it in details – it was most at the surface, I wasn´t really effective in my research for what I made a decision. The words what I wrote in the last sentences are no longer based on self-judgment – its fact – this is what I have allowed and it is unacceptable because they were not based/lived as a principle as One & Equal for what is best for all, also it was based on the mind/thoughts/emotions/feelings which are a separation from myself thus a deception of myself.

 

I can see that I have changed various points in the last year but in significant points I missed the train – I applied Self-Forgiveness but my Self-Corrective application & me as the living word wasn´t fixed within me thus I ran in my viscious circle – So, therefore I decided that I start from new. I created the last 2 days a plan which will support me in my effectiveness/discipline in work for what is best for all. I have now 3 Letters called –”My Decisions”, “My Statements”, “My Task-Plan”. The “My Decisions” & “My Statements” are fixed unless I add some points. The “My Task-Plan” will change when I have it done.

 

STAND UP is a STATEMENT & when its not applied/lived as a living word as me its for nothing and its a deception and separation of myself because the word in itself is me and not living the word is not living as who I am and for what I stand thus I am dishonest, I cheat myself and the world/environment.